Little Princess Tori has gone back to our Father in Heaven today. I feel very sad, and very sick to my stomach. I have been very angry today, and frustrated, and then I made it to the hospital, and felt the sweet spirit that was there. I know that she was sent here for a reason, but what that might be I might not know in this life. I know that she is with her brother, Carter. I know that someday we will get to play with those two little angels. What a blessing they have been to me in my life. Just to be near them, to touch them, to feel of their warmth. No thought or words could describe how i've felt being near these two little people. It has been a journey of tears, sorrow, laughter, and strength.
I am grateful for the journey, and the opportunity i've been given to be near Frank and Kayla. It has been such a coming together as family. I am so sad tonight. I have to admit that tonight the journey feels bitter. I feel so useless. I wish I could fix the heartaches, and the heartbreaks.
I am grateful for my little family...for JL who is my best friend...and JS who teaches me things like why turtles wear shells...(because they don't want you to see their Ninja Turtles undies) and for little JT who can brighten a room just by entering it. I love my husband. I love how he loves me...and I would do anything for him.
My heart hurts tonight for our family. I don't ever want to be without them. Thank You to everyone who prayed for Tori. Those prayers have been felt, and many prayers answered. I really appreciate everyone and your supporting me boosting me up with your comments. It has been such a blessing to have had her in our lives for the last month. I'll never forget the way I felt when she reached up and held my finger. I was able to peer into her soul, and i'll never be the same.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Gone back to heaven...
Posted by
Matchbox Mom
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8:53 PM
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13 comments:
I don't even know what to say except I'm so sorry, and I think you have really beautiful perspective. You really have a gift for articulating your feelings about this situation. Wow you weren't kidding when you said "Life Is Rough." But it's also beautiful and sometimes very short. Thanks for sharing your feelings, I'm sure that was hard. Love ya!
Oh, poor family. My sister in law had a stillborn, so being near her at that time gives me a tiny glimpse into how you & your family must be feeling. I'm so sorry for your pain.
I think your emotions right now are a normal part of the grief process. It's okay to feel that.
I admire so much how you are automatically turning to your own little family and your gratitude for them. Experiences like this one thrust a true and poignant perspective on us, don't you think?
I'm glad you had that moment with Tori when she reached for your finger. That's precious. I think the veil was thin for the two of you. Send hugs to Frank & Kayla. I'm grateful for your friendship & the insight it's already given me.
Oh Tami. I'm crying for you. I'm so sorry. I'm so glad you got to be with that sweet spirit for as long as you did, what a special experience. I will continue to pray for your family, you are in my thoughts.
Love you
~Steph
Oh, I feel so bad for little Tori's parents - I was so hopeful that in a few months they would be able to go home with their arms full. I can't even imagine how difficult this will be for them and for the rest of your family. We'll keep praying for you.
Love,
Janie
Like the others, I'm not really sure what to say except that I am sorry. I will keep your family in my prayers. I'm glad you're trying to keep a good perspective on the whole ordeal.
Last night when you called and said you were going to blog about this I was nervous, but what you said in this post is perfect.
Like Crystal I am so impressed that you have taken your experiences and used them to see your life with new perspective.
My heart aches for Frank and Kayla but I am so glad they have such an obviously supportinve and loving family so close to them. What a blessing you all are.
XO
Cecily
Thank You everyone! Really...your comments make me feel so much better. I am in love with this little angel, and will never forget her.
I appreciate all of you so much!
Tams
Oh Miss Tami! I am so sorry! I wish I had the words. I wish I could help. I wish I could do anything...
I'm so sorry, she really is an angel. I'm so glad you got to be so close & that this experience has brought the family so close!
What a sweet family you have.
Let me know if there is anything in this world I could do to help ya!
Love ya - Kate
I wish I knew the right words to say to you. I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you for what you have writen it is beautiful. I feel like I have gotten to know little Tori through your words. My prayers go out to you and your family.
I'm sorry to hear about Tori. Your family is in our thoughts and prayers.
Your post made me cry, but it's beautiful. I truly sorry for your family's loss. Your perspective is very clear, I am really glad you were able to share with us. We all learn from each other.
May God continue to strengthen you all, with His love and comfort you with His mercy and grace.
I like what dancin' queen said...it reminded me of a great country music song - Life Ain't Always Beautiful - here is the chorus -
"No, life aint always beautiful
Tears will fall sometimes
Life aint always beautiful
But it's a beautiful ride"
Sorry for so long of a post...
Peace,
Maria
Tami, I'm so sorry. Isn't it such a comfort to know that you can be with her again. I don't know how anyone could get through loosing a loved one without that knowledge. Now her spirit can be with your family always. Thanks for sharing your experience--Kami
Well, the rest of the story was as I feared ... I am not sure I can add to the comments already given. My heart goes out to the parents and the rest of your family. It is an underlying fear that I think most of us have .. to loose a child. It tears at the heart. Prayers and warm thoughts to the whole family.
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